Comedian Chris Rock has the answer for this: You take the number of guys your lady friend says she’s had sex with, and double it–at least. The reason is that she’s probably had all sorts of sexual experiences that, to her, “don’t count.” So Chris Rock’s advice, which is pretty good, is to double it–at least.
But the fact of the matter is that the problem isn’t how many sex partners your girlfriend has had–the problem is how upset you seem to be about it.
It’s never wise to put a woman on the defensive about her sexuality. You’ve asked her how many guys she’d slept with. She told you. She probably revised the number downwards so as to not hurt your feelings– sensing that you would be upset about her sexual past (as you seem to be), she revised the number downward to avoid trouble with you.
Now you are either badgering her about how many guys she’s slept with–“Are you sure you’ve only slept with five guys? How many have you gone down on?” etc., etc…or you are thinking about badgering her about it.
This insults her in two ways: you are calling her a liar, for misleading you about how many guys she’s slept with, and a slut, for having slept with so many guys she feels she needs to lie about it. Even if she has lied to you, and even if she has had a slutty past, you are only going to create trouble insulting her in this way. You are going to generate a fight with
her. And for what?
This all goes back to the basic distinctions of fighting with a woman: there is NO point in fighting with a woman. No matter what happens in a fight with a woman, you will lose. Either you lose the conflict, and she won’t have sex with you, or you win the conflict, and she won’t have sex with you. Or–worse case–she cries, and you REALLY lose.
Why is all this so important to you, anyway? Our advice for you is to let all this go, and, every time you want to get yourself upset by thinking about her sexual past, think about the fact that she is with you now, instead.
Let go of her past…it’ll only create trouble if you don’t.
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Ron Louis and David Copeland are dating coaches and authors of the best selling “How to Succeed with Women” and the creators of Seduction Techniques |
