From personal experience, I can give you a definite “no” to this one.
There are many reasons for a woman to use personal ads. It may be that she can’t meet guys any other way. But it may also be that she’s really gorgeous and wants a chance to meet a guy who’ll get to know her before finding out what she looks like.
It may be that she’s just shy. It may be that she has a busy career and has no other good way of meeting people. It may be that she’s got kids and doesn’t have much chance to get out. It may be that she is highly intelligent and has a hard time finding intelligent men in her everyday life.
It may be that she’s stuck in the middle of nowhere with few men around. Maybe she’s just trying this for the fun of it. Or maybe she just likes computers.
There are many good reasons to use personals ads. There’s nothing at all weird about a woman doing something like this.
Are all the men who use online personals desperate, unattractive, psychotic, or nerds?
I’ve personally known two other guys who’ve done this and they’re okay guys. And I don’t think I’m all that bad myself. For example, how many “nerds” or “losers” do you know who practice karate, skydive, ride horses, and own their own businesses?
As for “desperate,” well there have been times when I’ve been desperate for company, but I’ve had a number of lovers in my lifetime. I’ve even turned down women who wanted to be with me. I’m a little shy but I’ve usually done okay.
There are many reasons for a guy to use personal ads. It may be that he can’t meet girls any other way. But it may also be that he’s really gorgeous and wants a chance to meet a woman who’ll get to know him before finding out what he looks like.
It may be that he’s shy. It may be that he has a busy career and has no other good way of meeting people. It may be that he’s got kids and doesn’t have much chance to get out. It may be that he has a hard time finding intelligent women in his everyday life. Or it may be that he’s just trying something like this for the hell of it, just to see what happens.
Basically, there are many good reasons to use personal ads. There’s nothing at all weird about a man using something like this. It’s just one more way of meeting people, and a pretty good one if you do things right!
Okay, You say there are lots more men than women. That’s great if you’re a woman, but what if you’re a man? Are you screwed or what?
Absolutely not. You do have a challenge here, but it’s not hard to overcome if you’re intelligent and put a little effort into it. The real secret for you is to make sure to post your ad, but there are other things you can do. Don’t worry, man, you can do it. The world expects us to do the pursuing most of the time, and that’s true for ads as it is anywhere else, but we can manage.
Copyright 1995 and 1996 by Dean Esmay
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